Some…er…many of you may have noticed the inadvertent hiatus I have taken over the past several weeks. Every time I thought of Noah and thought about blogging it made me ache inside. Come Monday he will finally be back in my arms, after SIX very, very long weeks of being away with his father. This is our second summer apart and it hasn’t been any easier the second time around. I bury myself in photography and mountain biking to sooth my soul and ease my aching heart. I can’t wait to hold him in my arms again. I can’t wait to bask in his joy as he sifts through his drawers filled with pink, sparkles and wonderfully bright clothing.
Six weeks is a long time for a little one to go without much of what he loves. Six weeks is a long time for a child, just learning about himself, to go without that of which defines him as he likes to be defined at the moment. I know that he has a good time with his father but I also know that he feels like he has to hide the best of who he is as an individual, as it is not embraced in his father’s home.
My job as his mother, amongst a thousand and one other jobs, is to make sure that these periods of suppression do not define him as an individual, that they do not wreck his confidence and self esteem as an adult. I feel that he has such a beautiful spark to him and I don’t ever want him to lose that. It’s what I love most about him. His self confidence, the way he owns every little thing about himself…I love it so much and it makes me proud.
This blog has helped him sustain that confidence, as well as restore some of my faith in humanity. In the time that we’ve been blogging there has not been a SINGLE negative comment made on this blog. I’ve not been censoring or deleting ugly comments, they just simply do not exist. THIS is promising. This tells me that there is a need for more parents such as myself: Parents who embrace their children just as they are without forcing them into a stereotypical pigeon hole; Parents who speak out- who shout out to the world that we think our kids are fucking kick ass. More kids need to hear this. More PARENTS need to hear this. They all need to know that it’s okay to give gender stereotypes the proverbial finger. They need to know that they are fucking awesome…just the way they are.
And on that note: MY fucking awesome kid will be home in TWO MORE DAYS!!